Is 32 too old for a Birthday post?

I recently had a Birthday. At first I was going to just post some of the pictures from it in a Random post. But then I decided that I deserve my own Birthday post too. Especially since this year's Birthday was AWESOME! Kendrick and I decided that we wanted to take a little getaway to celebrate our Anniversary (which was in June) and to celebrate his hole in one. Oh, about the hole in one, yeah we aren't going on the golf trip anymore. We took the prize money instead. And bought a car. It has been the BIGGEST blessing.

It just so happened that the most convenient weekend to get away, just the two of us, was my Birthday weekend. So we arranged for my parents and our good neighbors to take our kids and then we spent one night in downtown Salt Lake and one night in Park City. We shopped, we ate awesome food, we enjoyed our Utah season tickets, we had a couples massage, we swam, we worked out...the whole weekend was wonderful. Then we came home and wrapped up my amazing Birthday weekend with some Banana Cream pie with the kids. We can't have a Birthday in this house without a candle and singing!

Thank you Kendrick for trying so hard to make my Birthday special. You did an excellent job. I feel blessed to be your wife!
Thank you Mom and Dad for taking the kids on Friday night. They love you guys and I always rest easy when I know they are with you.
Thank you Carissa for watching our kids on Friday afternoon. It made things so much easier!
Thank you Dean and Tiffany for letting our kids sleep over and for letting them tag along with you to Stake Conference. They had a blast!

The pictures...
in no particular order, because I am tired.

My birthday pie and my two oldest.

I was so tired. A weekend away from the kids is actually not as restful as one might think.

The prettiest parmesan knots I've ever seen.

Kendrick's heart attack on a plate. The only thing that saved him from keeling over is that after he ate this, he didn't eat for like 10 hours.

Trying to get a picture of the cool moon but instead got a decent picture of his wife. 

We may have spent more time than I ever thought I would spend in sunglass stores. Who knew finding the right pair of sunglasses for him would be so hard?

He looks like our nephew, Paxton, in this photo.

Such a FUN day at the stadium.

Eggplant parm and some sort of steak number. I wish I could eat eggplant parm every day for the rest of my life and still lose weight. 

Comic Con was in town that weekend. Darth was trying to catch a ride on TRAX.

I love this U and the Utah campus. I so wish I could have gone there. Stay in school kids.

Selfie in the shade before we sweated our hineys off at the game.

My yummy pre game breakfast. Who knew a place like Big Ed's could deliver such legit breakfast food?

Mama got a new do!

I have the world's slowest growing hair. My hairstylist and friend, Jessie will back me up on that. I am guessing (thanks to the suggestion of my lil brother) that it is because I don't have any animal protein in my diet. But even when I ate meat and cheese and milk my hair didn't grow super fast. I finally ordered some Biotin. I am hoping that it helps. Anyway so I had this... resolution if you will, not to cut my hair at all until 2014. I wanted to see how long I could get it by Christmas. But being that I have been coloring my hair blond for over a year now, and if you take into consideration how much time we spent in the sun and swimming this summer my hair was getting dry. Like embarrassingly so. So I let Jessie clip it. It's not a huge length difference but it does make my hair look shorter. Also, the bleach blond was making me feel trashy. It would fade and I'd start to see regrowth so fast that I started to wonder if it was even worth it to be that shade of blond anymore. So I went a tad darker and then took a HUGE risk and went against everything my husband believes in by getting bangs. Gasp! Kendrick really hates bangs. It's unclear if he hates them in general or if he just hates them on me or if he had a bad experience once with a girl who had bangs...
In any case, I didn't ask and it doesn't matter. Sometimes you just have to try something new and if it fails miserably, it fails miserably. Life goes on right?

But I rather like how it turned out and since I know I will never be able to style it again as cute as Jessie did, here are the pics to prove that my haircut has potential.

ta da!

you can see the bangs better in this one

it feels so short:(

its hard to tell, but the back looks so much healthier now

Thanks Jess! I love it. I really love it.

My Birthday (I took the whole weekend)

I turned 31 on the 5th. It makes me sad if I think about it too much. And I have tried several times to blog about it. I have written nice things about all the people who go me stuff, and the fun day I had and the awesome things we did in the weekend that followed, and every time I go to upload pics, my computer freezes. Then I have to shut it down in order to restart it and then I return to Blogger only to find out that it deleted the content of each of my post attempts. So here are the pictures from my Birthday. The day was perfect. The weekend was so much fun. I hate getting old. And Kendrick is the greatest. That pretty much sums up my 31st for ya.

Kendrick took the day off work. He made me the most delicious cinnamon swirl french toast ever with sliced strawberries on top then we took a morning walk. That afternoon we went out to lunch and did some girl shopping. Then we came home and ate cake and ice cream with the neighbors that watched our kids for us.

My Birthday fortune. I hope it is true!!

We had Chinese for my Birthday lunch and I practically licked my plate clean

Kendrick making the best out of being stuck in Forever 21 with a woman who wasn't quite sure what she wanted

The Birthday flowers that Easton helped our neighbor pick out for me. After giving her a sermon on who Satan is and "why he makes us do bad things" he informed her that I love pink and purple flowers. My favorite flower shades are actually reds, white, oranges and yellows. But I love that he thought he knew me so well:)

Red Velvet cake with the Espinoza family (like my snowman tablecloth?)

My Birthday loot. The kids got me an iTunes gift card. Kendrick took me shopping and I found a mirror for my makeup table, a denim shirt, 3 pairs of jeans, a DC tee and a cute sweatshirt. Then I treated myself to some Mary Kay eyelash serum and the Carly Simon live in Martha's Vineyard cd.

On Friday night my parents took us all to Chuckarama for my Birthday dinner. Then I was spoiled and got a new blender, a cardigan, some authentic Oregon made Salt Water taffy and an Amazon gift card. I came home and purchased these makeup brushes and some smelly lotion (like, it stinks and will be sent back ASAP) with my gift card:

This is the most unflattering picture ever but Tay was in rare form that night and was cracking me up with how excited she got over each of my gifts. This sweater was her favorite.

On Saturday we attended the Keller William's Red Bash in Pleasant Grove where Kendrick had to man one of the game booths. The kids had a blast watching the Magician and playing on the playground and filling their pockets with candy.

After the Red Bash we got ready to see James Taylor perform with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir and The Utah Symphony. We left way early and stood in line in the rain to get seats in our assigned section as close as we could to the stage. I cried. I've never cried at a concert. Not even when I almost got trampled at Kings Of Leon...although this was a different kind of crying. I have loved James Taylor's music since I was a little girl and have wanted to see him in concert since I could first comprehend what concerts were. I held it together and only managed to be choked up for his first two solo songs and then when he sang, On The Roof I lost it and did the ugliest silent cry ever.

There is another picture like this where our faces are a lot clearer, but the thumb of the lady that took it graces the majority of that photo so I chose this one instead. It's the perfectionist in me, I can only post pics that I think look good.

After the concert we were starving and it was pouring rain so we just ate random fast food from two different drive ins.  Honestly, it was so chill but it was one of the funnest dates that Kendrick and I have had in a long time. I am so glad that we not only got to go see James Taylor, but that it happened to fall on my Birthday weekend. I am one lucky girl.

So much to celebrate!!

Okay, so my baby is FOUR today. 4 freaking years old! Man, time flies. There is so much to celebrate today. First and foremost, I have a healthy, happy, hilarious and smart little four year old boy on my hands. Second, it only took me 4 years but I have finally returned to my pre-Easton weight. I debated posting this, I don't want to weird anyone out. But I am kind of proud of myself. It took a lot of hard work and finally just buckling down and making some serious life changes to achieve this:

I weighed 209 when I delivered Easton. I weigh 139 four years later. Unfortunately, my boobs are gone:( And while I don't love looking like a boy up top, I do give thanks for my wide array of padded bras.

I sincerely hope that my posting this does not come across as bragging. That is not my intention at all. Honestly, my intention is to encourage others and to have this progress documented for my own sake. Because I remember being 9 months pregnant with Easton and just wishing I could be done with pregnancy forever. I remember being 2 months post partum and wondering if I would ever feel normal again. I remember when he turned 1 year old and me finally just saying, "Well, I guess this is just what my body will look like from now on..." I tried countless diets, a number of thermogenics and shakes, and partook in a butt load of self proclaimed quick fix exercise routines that did nothing but wear me out, make me look foolish and left me discouraged.

What finally, FINALLY worked FOR ME was persistence-working out at least 4 days a week (even if it was only for 20 minutes) and changing my diet. I am not on a diet. I just changed my diet. I no longer eat meat, cheese, dairy (yogurt, cream cheese, ice cream, milk) or eggs. I cut back on the amount of baked goods that I make or eat. I cut WAY back on the amount of milk chocolate I eat and I try to eat as little processed food as possible. Although, on the weekends I fail miserably at that being that potato chips are one of life's little treasures. I think if I could eliminate refined sugars from my diet I would be able to seriously tone up, but I am having a hard time gaining self control when it comes to treats like snow cones and salt water taffy...

I posted this picture on Instagram and got some sweet feedback/questions from friends. So here goes my little rant for those who are even remotely interested in how I am achieving my goal:

I had to find a workout plan that wasn't intimidating. P90X isn't for me. TurboJam isn't for me. I wish I could say they are, but they leave me feeling stupid and exhausted. Also, I have to workout by myself. I don't do well working out with other people. That is not the case for everyone, I know. But for me, I don't push myself when I work out with other people. It becomes more about socializing and less about burning calories. When I am alone, I can sweat, look like a fool and pass gas without being embarrassed. Can you believe I just said that? And I had to try a lot of different exercises to finally come up with some workouts that I actually enjoy. I had to stop doing what other people told me I would enjoy. I hate Zumba. I don't like weight training. I am not a hard core runner. I like yoga. I like kickboxing. I love walking on the treadmill and jogging. I love the mini trampoline and my fitness ball and my 5 pound hand weights. I love Jillian Michael's Banish Fat Boost Metabolism, Jillian Michael's Cardio Kickbox and Sara Ivanhoe's Fat Burning Yoga.

I also had to seriously, drastically change my diet. But the thing is, I didn't do that to lose weight. I have battled anxiety and depression since becoming a mother. Honestly, I think I've struggled with it my whole life but it just became more evident when I became a mother. In the fall of 2011 when we were in the process of losing our home, we were flat broke. Like we had no money coming in, at all. We were having some personal difficulties and I had a choice to make: I could go into debt filling prescriptions for my anxiety/depression that I didn't feel were working, or I could try to find alternate methods of dealing with my anxiety/depression and save us some money. I chose the latter. And it was so hard. It took me about 3 months, but I eventually learned to like soy, almond and coconut milk. Cows milk grosses me out big time now. And it took me over a year but I finally just quit cheese. Do I recommend this to everyone? No. But I, personally do not care to put animal products in my body anymore. And since I stopped I have been able to better manage my anxiety/depression. I have had far less breakouts. I have more energy and I am having an easier time achieving my weight loss goals. If you are going to throw the "but you aren't getting enough nutrients" crap at me-than you should know, I have done my homework. I know exactly how much fiber, protein, iron and vitamins A, B and C my kids and I should be getting each day and I know where to get them. The bottom line is, I changed my diet to feel better. As a result, I started looking better.

Lastly, I had to change my attitude. If you are down on yourself and stressed all the time and withdraw from the people in your life who make you happy, you will have a hard time achieving any goal. If you keep an attitude of gratitude, surround yourself with encouraging, upbeat and cheerful people, and embrace opportunities to have fun and socialize than you will be more successful. Me staying home and feeling sorry for myself while watching smut on TV or continuing on with friendships that left me spiritually and emotionally drained was taking a toll on me. Me having a negative attitude and focusing on all that I didn't have was just draining my energy. Also, praying helps. I don't know why, but it does. I pray for the motivation to work out. I pray to have patience with my body. I give prayers of thanks when I achieve my goals.

And that's it. Nothing fancy. No trainer. No shakes. No paid program. Just me doing my best to burn calories and be happy and eat right. Oh, and I should give a small shout out to MyFitnessPal-I use that sight religiously to count my calories. So, yeah, I guess that helped too;)

The point is, if you have been following me since I first started blogging, you know that losing weight has been a goal of mine for years. I have wanted this so badly. And now I am SO close to reaching my goal. Not only that, but I have this gorgeous kid to celebrate with:

I am blessed.

I almost forgot!!!

How horrible would it be if I left Easton, my youngest, my pride and joy, out of the Birthday wish list fun?! Actually, he probably wouldn't even notice that I didn't post  his items but when this blog is made into a book-he'd be all like, "What the heck mom? I wasn't good enough at almost 4 years old to be included in the wishlist fun?" And I can't have that. Plus, here's a confession: I've totally been making a list of my own these past few days...
What can I say- smart phones make it too easy to covet things you don't have! So I'll just slip my wishlist right into this post...at the very end.

But for now, here is my baby's:

He loves himself some Super Heroes

He has wanted these FOREVER and I've just been to flaky to remember:(

Our boy loves, I mean LOVES to color and draw-these are like his dream come true!

Even though he'w at least a year out from starting school-he still insists that he needs a lunch bag

He has also wanted the Walmart version of these for months and I kept telling him, "for your Birthday, for your Birthday.." Guess who's Birthday is a week away and mom can't find these at Walmart anymore? I'm sorry but I'm just not willing to pay what the Crocs website wants for them.

He saw this in Target 2 months ago and fell in love with it. I researched it and not only does this little set start at $60, but it got crap reviews:( Apparently the toys are super breakable and don't last very long.

It is sad that we don't own my youngest son's favorite movie.

He wants a "gubrella" or a "murella" for his Birthday. Guess him and I have lots of playing in the rain in our future this fall...

And here is mine. For my 31st Birthday I would like:

A trip to Oregon. Kendrick has never been to the Northwest coast and my grandparents and cousins are there. I grew up spending a week each summer there and I would love nothing more than to share it with my family.

Cannon Beach-home of the BEST cinnamon salt water taffy

Portland

If I can't go to Oregon-I'll need to hit something. So this is the next best gift option! Just kidding. I have been doing a lot of kick boxing YOUTube videos lately and I really just think I could tear it up with some loud music and a punching bag. I know I said years ago that I wanted a mini trampoline and it's taken me this long to finally use it (I use it almost 5 days a week now) But I really think I'd bust these bad boys out and use them right away.

And if I'm going to let out that much aggression and burn that many calories-I'll need to look cute while I do it. I could use some new work out clothes-bad!

And then I will need to wind down after my workout. OR I'll need some easy listening on the drive to Oregon, so I found this- this was my FAVORITE album when I was little. I have a feeling I'd still love it if I heard it now:)

And these are just plain cute: